Journal Entry

Sex during pregnancy: Unveiling the myths

My husband and I have always had very healthy sex drives. I guess that’s why we had three kids in our first five years of marriage–two while we were using birth control. While, pregnant, we didn’t think a little thing like a baby should slow us down. I did worry about harming the fetus.

I’ll never forget my husband’s going to one of my doctor’s visits with me. He asked my obstetrician, one of hubby’s hunting buddies, at what point we should curtail our daily sex trysts. His answer, and I quote, “Just get off of her before you bring her to the hospital.” So, with the green light, our escapades continued.

Some folks say a woman enjoys sex more during pregnancy because of certain hormones. I found this to be true in my case, with all three pregnancies. Everything was just so much more sensitive, especially my nipples. And while stimulating the breasts and nipples can cause uterine contractions, they don’t cause premature labor.

Having sex doesn’t harm the baby, either, unless there’s a problem. Ask your doctor if sex is okay during your pregnancy. The baby is well-protected and cushioned in the mother’s uterus and amniotic sac, so pregnancy sex is safe for most expectant mothers.

I don’t know what I would have done if the doctor had said I couldn’t have sex while being bombarded with those crazy hormones! And they lasted awhile after delivery, too. I remember after having my second child, while I was still in the hospital, hubby and I “fooled around” in that narrow hospital bed. We had a friend stand outside the door as a guard. While that particular encounter did not involve actual penetration, it was great - kind of like sneaking around behind your parents’ backs!

It’s too bad they can’t bottle that sexy pregnancy hormone. I’d buy it by the barrel. But be aware, not every woman experiences this increased sex drive during pregnancy.

Some women say sex during pregnancy is painful, especially in the last month or so. This is probably due to a greatly expanded belly. Just experiment with different positions, like rear entry, for example, until you find one that is comfortable. Some of the pain from penetration could come from dryness caused by hormones. Again, this is easy to remedy with any water-based lubricant.

Another myth is that sexual intercourse will cause premature labor. Hogwash! If that were true, none of my babies would have been full-term! And all three of them were full-term, healthy babies with normal birth weights. I actually thought a couple of them might have been born tightly grasping a condom in a tiny balled-up fist, with a little smile on their red wrinkled faces. But that didn’t happen, either.

So if you’re pregnant, check with your doctor about the safety of sex. If he assures you it’s okay, then go for it. If you find that sex is uncomfortable, or if you’re uncomfortable about the way you look or feel with a big belly and large, full breasts, talk with your partner. Remember that he loves you; and your expanding shape probably bothers you more than it does him. Sincere communication is the key to every relationship, and during the stress of pregnancy is no time to hold your tongue. And speaking of stress, I know a great stress reliever! Try it; you’ll like it!